She calls me Muffin.
“Muffin can you take out the trash?”
“Muffin what do you want for dinner?”
“Muffin! Guess what?!”
I honestly don’t remember when it started. It’s not like I showed up for the first date and she told me hey you’re Muffin now.
But I never minded. It’s weird that I never minded, right? It’s entirely possible her friends don’t even know my real name. I do remember her explaining once that Muffin was a appropriate because I was “slightly sweet and great in the morning.” I was like…
All I know is ever since I’ve achieved Muffin status, life has been pretty great. When she decided I was her Muffin there was nothing she wouldn’t do for me.
A little after we started dating, the car that I fought to keep going for over a decade finally screwed me over for the last time. She drove me around to car lots every weekend until I was able to find something I could afford. We were brand new, I didn’t have my own place, and at the time I made half as much money as she did. She could have easily decided I wasn’t worth her time and kicked my muffin ass to the curb.
But she didn’t do that. Because I was her muffin. She stuck with me until I got myself a Muffinmobile. And she stuck with me still even when I had to get a second job to help pay for it, which meant less time for her. I was working somewhere around 60+ hours a week for an entire year and there was no way in hell I would have been able to do it without her. She could always make me laugh when I needed it. Not that fake, pity laugh you have to do with your unfunny-ass girlfriend. She has me rolling.
When I decided to finally take the next step in my career and accepted a job almost two hours away from her, she was nothing but supportive. She even helped me move.
I hate telling this story… but when moving to my current apartment, my mattress fell off the top of the truck because I was too much of a dumbass to strap it down. I didn’t even know the damn thing had fallen off. I looked in my rear view mirror and saw my girlfriend dragging my queen sized mattress off of I-65 in Birmingham by herself at 5 o’clock rush hour on a Friday. Whatever the previous scariest moment of my life was before that day became a distant second place. She told me later that some guys drove by honking yelling something about her ass while she was on the side of the road.
Every word of that is true…and she did it because I was her Muffin.
What’s worse, I don’t really have a cute nickname like that for her. She likes to refer to herself as my Brownie, but that does not at all do her justice. Only one title I can think of even comes close…wife.
Victoria my life has been nothing but better since you entered it. You are far more than I deserve and I am a better man because of you. I would be thrilled to be your Muffin for the rest of my life.
Will you marry me?